In the morning I woke up like every other young lad of my generation using one of the most highly addictive social platforms, Instagram. Scrolling down, hitting like button, sometimes stalking and sometimes just uninterestedly going along and there I ended up seeing something that frustrated me to the level that I got out of the bed and the next thing I did was to open my blog and pour down the frustration on it through my words. Before we proceed let me apologize because down below I am going to be very much brutally honest and I wont be sorry for it.
To start with, I need to mention the reason which influenced me to write. I was going through one of the official accounts of a tv actress (not mentioning the name due to respect). Apparently she appeared bit darker in complexion and bulky in physique. She had her personal life photos on her account. Just as casually as we all upload our stuff. but then I noticed something that frustrated me furiously. The particular lady had some of her pictures uploaded without any “beautifying effects”. Just her natural look showing her simplicity. It caught my attention so much that I opened the comment box to appreciate her simplicity but what I saw, shocked me instead. Comments like “Khofnaak“, “Draa kyun rahi ho?”, “Motti“, “Apnay mottapay ka raaz tou btaao” “Skin check kro” etc etc etc.
After reading those comments I was still calm because I was considering the fact that as any woman she is required to have a fairer skin and a slimmer body to get appreciative comments from men. But what made my head spin was that ALL those comments came from WOMEN. Yeah feel it. A woman bullying another woman for her skin color? Her physique? Her skin texture? then why to blame men?
I have seen women criticizing men for being so judgmental about their appearances and their looks. But what would you comment on women doing the same stuff? Ain’t it more insulting? This is the reason why girls go to every extreme to bring fairness to their skin. Eat less than their basic health needs to look slimmer. This is the real murder to the confidence of every single girl out there who wants to be as socially active as all the women with lighter skin are.
My dear ladies! If you continue to do this on public platforms and then act Mazloom when you are judged by men then I am sorry. You are your own culprit. Killing the confidence of someone who is just being realistic and not adding so many filters to hide their apparent flaws; is a brutality. At least she didn’t act fake and I believe that in this deceptive world being honest and confident is the only thing that is authentically beautiful. I know my blog wont make any significant impact on anyone’s mentality but the least it can do is to just add a bit more noise to kill the silence of the lot against bullying. Spread Love not judgments.
I have attached a picture of few of the comments and hid the names of the girls commenting because i am still left with alot of gender respect even if they don’t have.
Suno Baba! – http://wp.me/p8rHvv-p
فرصت کے لمحے جب آئیں تم کو میسر۔۔
!ملنا پھر اپنی لاڈلی کو خوابوں میں تم اکثر
،کرنا پھر باتیں، ہر پل کی ہر لمحے کی
!نہ چھیڑیں گے کوئ بات کسی دکھ کی کسی سانحے کی
دہرائیں گے ہر اس یاد کو ساتھ میں ہم
!جب ساتھ تھے اور ساتھ تھے بس ساتھ تھے ہم
وہ دن بیت گئے بابا ،جب شام ڈھلے
تم لوٹ کر آتے تھے بہت تھکےتھکے۔۔
میں تو دستک کی آواز سے پہچان جاتی تھی۔۔
قدموں کی چاپ کے قربان جاتی تھی۔۔
اب نہ دستک ہوتی ہے نہ کوئ آہٹ آتی ہے۔۔
لوٹ آتی ہوں ہر شام یہ سوچ کے تھک کر۔۔
کے ملنے کو آوگے اب تم خوابوں میں اکثر۔۔
آنکھیں ہیں کے جانے، “ترسی” ہوئ ہیں یا “تر “سی ہوئ ہیں
بہتی ہیں ایسے کے کبھی نہر سی ہوئ ہیں تو کبھی بہر سی ہوئ ہیں
تکلیف کی شدت ہے کے کم ہی نہیں ہوتی۔۔
گزرتی ہوئ گھڑیاں تو قہر سی ہوئ ہیں۔۔
دن بیتے سال بیتے ، یا بیتے عمر۔۔
جوانی گزرے، بھڑاپا آئے یا وقت قبر۔۔
بھولنا نہ کبھی تم یہ پیما نے پدر۔۔
ملنا پھر اپنی لاڈلی کو خوابوں میں تم اکثر۔۔
19th April 2016 marks 4 years of our separation. The bond of love we share however, continues to strengthens with time. Hope you lay asleep with angels around. Sending my love and prayers your way with a special prayer that may no daughter goes through what your daughters do. Ameen.
Dated : 19th April’2017.
I woke up early today or to rephrase it the way other round i would say that despite of another sleepless spell of night i woke up comparatively earlier today. Dressed up and just left for hospital. Yeah hospital. Calender showing 10th. April. Your Birthday and my first internship day at Neurology Department. Irony of life, May be? The only person who would burn all his boats to see me sail, who would not feel shame to own my failure and label it as a beginner’s try. The one who have had been ready to go to any extent of sacrifice just to see me wearing this white coat and holding this stethoscope. Whenever i would say ” i am losing hope. I am weak. I am may be not as charming as the other girls around. I am flawed. I am a trouble-maker”.. he by the virtue of his gentle expressions and everlasting smile would convince me to the point that every negative would sound positive, every weakness just my strength and every failure like my sucess. With every step that i took towards and inside the hospital. I had him within me. In the elevator i saw him standing next to me and telling me not to suffocate. On the walls i saw his picture smiling and saying that “yes, you made it”. Just next to the neuro surgeon was him standing and listening to every question that i raised during the lecture. I felt him taking the pride. In my observations, in my writings, in my every gesture He was around. He stayed there till i stayed there. I saw him living every moment of it side by side with me. He is my dear departed. He is the reason to my survival. My most valued asset, my beloved Father. Its his fourth birthday that we are not celeberating together. Four years have passed and Allah knows how. I wanted to start blogging but nothing gave me a kick start more than this emotional trauma. I hope somewhere he is reading this. If its right then i would never stop writing. Even if my hands ache and even if i get short of vocabulary i would write and speak my heart out to him. The person behine me being me. Life gets unfair and sometimes steals away our most precious belongings. But they just dont leave. They stay. They live with us. In our daily routines. They are just there. So is He. Dedicating my first ever writing on a social platform to the most valued asset of my life. I miss you Abu jee. I am doing it the way you wanted it. With this hope that you’re watching me. I am not losing hope. I am brave. I know this too shall pass. But you not being around makes everything incomplete. I miss beyond eternity.
Yours child ♡
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